Fundraising for “The Perfect Victim”
There's a reason some fundraising stories feel easier to tell than others. Stories about animals, "grateful" clients, and non-political solutions raise money quickly because they tap into what donors already believe about who deserves help. But what happens when those easy stories erase the complexity and humanity of the people you actually serve?
On this week's episode of The Small Nonprofit Podcast, host Maria Rio sits down with Esther Lee, a fundraising and equity strategist who's part of the inaugural Community-Centric Fundraising Global Council and a leader of the Asian Fundraisers in Canada Collective. Esther shares a story that will make you rethink every donor appeal you've ever written. When a contractor delivered a direct mail campaign that completely erased the survivors her women's shelter served, she faced a choice. Send it and watch the money roll in, or refuse, even though it could mean leaving revenue on the table.
Spoiler: She chose her values. And the organization didn't just survive. It thrived. Esther increased revenue by 51% over two years while developing a national language guide that challenges harmful narratives across Canada's shelter system.
If you've ever felt uneasy about how your organization tells stories, or wondered whether ethical fundraising can actually work, this episode will give you both the framework and the courage to do things differently.
Ethical Fundraising - The Highlights:
The "Ideal Victim" Framework: Esther introduces sociologist Nils Christie's concept of who society deems "deserving" of compassion; those seen as weak, vulnerable, respectable, and harmed by a clearly bad offender. Sound familiar? Nonprofits unconsciously replicate these biases every time we sanitize stories to make donors comfortable.
The Dog Campaign That Never Was: When Esther and her team of survivors gave extensive input on an intersectional campaign, the contractor delivered a direct mail piece featuring a cartoon dog. The entire appeal hinged on the shelter's pet program, completely erasing the refugee, immigrant, harm-reduction clients they actually served. It would've raised money but she refused to send it.
What Gets Left Out When You Lead with Pets: Every time Esther talked about the shelter's pets, donations poured in. But when she talked about systemic poverty, substance use, or the reality of being a newcomer survivor in Toronto's housing crisis? Uneasiness. The pattern revealed who donors saw as "deserving" of help or not.
Audit Your Storytelling Practices: Esther challenges listeners to look at who gets featured in newsletters, grant applications, and appeals. Are you sharing the full scope of challenges? Or are you scared to talk about complexity because you're trying to cultivate a donor base that wants simple stories?
The Cost Beyond Revenue: If you only measure success by money raised and ignore the trust you're losing with your community, staff, and the people you serve—that's a cost you can never fix. Esther asks: What metrics are you using? And who are you leaving out of your stories?
🎧 Listen to our episodes for actionable fundraising tips and insights on nonprofit leadership, nonprofit governance, productivity & tools, and donor engagement strategies that work. We're here to eliminate nonprofit burnout and boost your donations!
✏️ Liked this episode? Have an idea?
👉🏼 Check out our past episodes
Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or YouTube
If you want to learn how Further Together helps nonprofits raise more, this link will explain.
Ethical Fundraising– 5 Actionable Tips:
Center the people you serve. Build trust, establish consent policies, and be aware of power dynamics when asking clients for stories. This isn't a quick fix. It's deep, ongoing internal work.
Audit your storytelling practices. Review your communications from the past year. Who gets featured? Whose testimonials do you use? Are you describing an "idealized" version of your clients while hiding the complexity of their situation?
Ask: What stories are we erasing? If you're leading with the "easy" story (pets, children, grateful beneficiaries), what's getting left out? Why are you scared to talk about your other programs? Who are you trying to protect by keeping things simple?
Assess the cost, not just the revenue. Before sending that campaign, ask yourself: What trust am I risking with my community? Am I aligning with our stated values? What biases am I unconsciously perpetuating about who "deserves" help?
Budget time for reflection. Schedule regular time to critically examine your communications, challenge unconscious biases, and create space for staff and board to call each other in when storytelling practices feel exploitative.
Resources:
Connect with Esther Lee on LinkedIn or visit Elevate Philanthropy Consulting. You can also read Esther's article here: "You're Not Feeling Imposter Syndrome, You Are an Imposter: Identity and Belonging in Nonprofit Work"
Connect with the show: Watch the episode on YouTube; follow Maria Rio or Caitlin McBride on LinkedIn for more conversations and resources. Or support our show. We are fully self-funded!
Book a Discovery Call with Further Together: Need help with your fundraising? See if our values-aligned fundraisers are a fit for your organization.
